Tuesday, June 16, 2009

Inside Out

Dating has not been my forte (there should be an accent over the e but I don't know how to do it on a laptop).

I didn't do it much in college; instead, I took care of the studies, hung out with friends and spent more time partying. I did my share of "mingling" in college but I cannot lay claim to having dated anyone in particular. The closest I ever came to dating someone was Far Rock and let's face it, that was NEVER too much of an option.

Since then (it's been a few years now), I've not done too much of it. There have been a few guys here and there but no one steady at all. Not one of them has really tickled my fancy too much. Part of me thinks it is because I get bored quickly and the other part of me thinks they're just not my speed (in the likes and dislikes department); either way, we end up not speaking anymore.This pretty much happens all the time. I'm not home a lot and keep quite busy but rarely is it because I'm taking a stroll with a gentleman.

I've been looking internally b/c I never date. Lucky says it has more to do with me focusing on school, partying, work, etc. It's never been a big deal to me and it's not that it's a bid deal now - I just want to do it more! With my current state of self-reflection, I've kind of come up empty about why I'm not. I do have some maybes: Maybe I don't smile enough, maybe I don't do the "girly look" enough. Maybe I seem intimidating. Maybe it's all of that. I'm continuing to search and will figure it out. The glow on the inside needs to shine on the outside! Perhaps it'll be one of those things that I'll work on internally so long that dating will actually just start to happen.

Hmmmmm...

2 comments:

K*Mack said...

hmmmmm...interesting post, as I am also going through some self reflection. I doubt it's bc you don't look "girly enough" unless you wear Dickies and Timbs and a hoodie everywhere you go. I think given the right individual they'd be able to see through all of that hon. I think that if you are happy and strive to make yourself happy, that alone will attract the right people...so since I feel like I am preaching I will stop now..lol

Unknown said...

Thing about self reflection is sometimes you are a little too rough on yourself...with that said, YOU'RE FINE, I LIKE YOUR STYLE!!

As far as dating (pause as I rub my temples)........honestly, I'm in the same friggin boat as you. HOWEVER I believe, my dating life will change in it's time, so I need to continue working on the inner me.

And like most things in life, tht special someone will come when you least expect it.

XOXO