Friday, May 8, 2009

Passin' Me By.

A week ago we had a "Farewell and thanks for all you've done" sendoff for one of our co-workers who'd been at the company for about 20 years. Chief, who left a couple of months ago, was the host for the sendoff for his former boss. As always with him (and the ladies), the topic turned to relationships.

We got into a discussion on how hard it is sometimes for men to talk to women for many different reasons. While I was off in a sub-topic about another "Men are from Mars, Women are from Venus" conversation, the primary topic was still going on - this time talking about HOW men and women meet. I don't know how it got started but when I tuned in, Tamale was saying that she would never talk to a guy she met on the street. It kind of took everyone by surprise that she said that because we were all wondering (seemingly), "Well how do you meet the men you meet?" Tamale said she preferred to meet men in a lounge (not a club) because it's "easier to talk to a guy there. What are we going to talk about if we meet on the street?" So, the next obvious question was, "Why don't you talk to guys on the street?" Her answer: Those men, in her eyes, are desperate.

Yes, I know...WOW. But we needed to discuss this further because I've never heard that reasoning. Tamale said that there's not a real discussion that you could start with someone you see on the street. Further, "why are those men just standing around waiting to talk to a woman? They're probably trying to talk to every woman that passes by." After we explained to her that we're not talking about homeboy on the corner doing nothing with his life but rather, a guy you might see while you're both walking, she still said "No thank you." For Tamale, it's totally weird to talk to a guy she sees in passing and a guy she meets at a lounge will do. I asked her how she would feel if the guy who was trying to approach her in the street ended up being a guy who was also in the lounge, she shrugged and said, "Oh well. And it would be okay if he didn't want to talk to me anymore either." In ending the conversation, she said that when she's walking she just doesn't want to be bothered - just leave her alone and let her get to her destination. Finally, she added that maybe she grew up in somewhere like Brooklyn, her attitude about it would be different.

Is this an opinion shared by others? Ladies, would you not talk to a man you saw on the street (remember, he's not homeboy standing on the corner)? If so, why not? Gentlemen, would an opinion like this turn you off and have you giving the screw face?


1 comment:

LovinMe4Me said...

If the man approached me like a gentleman while I was on the streets, yes I would talk to him. Seriously, why the heck not.

Ms. Blue knows how I can be, so I'm going to be good....I will say to homegirl, you stick to the lounges, more for me outside the lounges.