An old college friend sent me a text out of the blue two weeks ago. I haven't spoken to her in years and so I was surprised to hear from her but I've been missing her like crazy so I was super excited. Turns out, she was mad at me because I turned down the offer to be in her wedding. Not true but that's neither here nor there.
During our text convo, she asked me who my "new boy" was (read: "who is your new man?"). I told her that I was single and just hanging out here and there. She replies and I quote, "That is a damn shame. You're getting too old." EXCUSE ME?? *picture the ILL neck roll right here* My defenses immediately go up and I say, "That is NOT a damn shame and there ain't shit wrong with being single." I was completely offended by that rude comment because (1) who just SAYS that and (2) what makes her the authority?? I should point out that she is 28, married and has two children so I guess that's what makes her think she is the authority.
I was pissed because I enjoy my life as it is (hell, I DO admit to needing to date more) and don't appreciate someone judging it because it doesn't follow where they are in their life. As much love as I have for her, we haven't spoken in about three or four years so she doesn't know what's going on with me; in fact, I questioned the real purpose of this surprise text. The truth is, after she said that, I didn't have any real interest in continuing the conversation for the evening.
Unfortunately, she isn't the only one who feels that if you're 30 (or close to it like me and most of my friends) and single AND childless, your life is basically not worth living. Kick the bucket. Roll over and DIE. I've had countless friends, associates and friends of friends who have live by this rule - they either own up to subscribing to this thought or they think it subconsciously. Sometimes, I wonder if that's why some of them are married and/or have children...so they won't fall into that group of people they feel so bad for. Are they TRULY happy in their situation or are they learning how to be happy in their situation because they think they're supposed to be living that life?
Far be it for me to judge them...and damn sure far be it for them to judge me. Kick rocks then!