Sunday, September 13, 2009

Touch Me, Tease Me

We've talked about sex on here and last year, we specifically discussed Emergency Sex in a Glass and how we should all have some. But what if you don't?

Men say all the time, "Ladies, you can get it when you want it" and I agree with that. But a friend has bought up the topic of "Involuntary Celibacy." Involuntary Celibacy, in case you didn't catch the clear definition is when a person hasn't CHOSEN to be "out the game" but that is clearly the case. Now yes, someone of the male species may approach her but this man doesn't count because he has nothing to offer (I don't mean financially - I mean he has nothing going on mentally, socially, etc..) thus keeping her in that celibate state of mind. Exes or former jumpoffs may/may not be people she still speaks but sex is not an option for them (we're women and some of us get emotionally attached again when we go back).

So the idea that women can just always GET IT isn't as simple as it seems. My friend wants to know what can a woman do about her involuntary celibate status BESIDES have an unhealthy sex affair with food, watch porn and hate on the chick getting down, and breaking the toys while pleasing herself which, she says, gets boring after awhile. She needs assistance and all my suggestions were all things she'd tried already. LOL!

What say you? What are some other techniques to deal with this? Should she be putting herself out there more with new men?

Let's talk. *see, quick and to the point - I know ya'll don't always LOVE my lengthy posts.*


Organized Chaos said...

Wow, seeing as though I am in the same position and have been back on this seemingly lonely island before, I can relate. I've tried all of those things and then some. The only things that seem to help me are either finding a hobby to take my mind off of it or doing stuff that will help me look/feel better physically and or spiritually. I am talking reading (no steamy romance novels, Zane is off limits!) that will stimulate your mind, if you are a writer, write until your fingers are tired, do stuff to make you look and feel better, my personal favs are working out, getting massages, getting regular mani/pedis, revamping your look/wardrobe ie do different stuff with your hair....just find a passion that doesn't involve thinking about the little-man-in-the-boat-rocking that you're lacking. I hope this helps!!

K*Mack said...

Interesting. I'm kinda with OC, keep yourself busy. There are so many other things stimulating in this world than just sex. Speaking from a standpoint of someone that has always had a healthy sexual appetite and have always have ppl that I can go to or get it from, I can say that it's overrated. I personally am taking a break (going through post dumping) and feel like someone is really gonna have to put in that work now if they want some of this. After coming out of a 2 year relationship where the sex was the best I've ever had...I've had to reevaluate...not anyone can just get this (not to say that just anyone did before).

Worst case scenario. please yourself.

N.O. LADI said...

Ummm, yeah , I have nothing to add here. Lol. Celibacy matter the reason. Your friend should just keep her self busy. Focus her mind on other things. That is all.