Wednesday, December 23, 2009

Is HOME where the HEART is?

I was born in Brooklyn. Moved to Queens when I was three years old. Moved back to Brooklyn somewhere around 12 or 13 years old. I left for fours years to go to college, got the degree and came on back. I'm a New Yorker to my HEART and if you cut me, eight letters may form from the blood: B-R-O-O-K-L-Y-N. Okay, maybe not but living in NYC is like my heart (though I enjoy traveling when I can to see other places).

We were talking today about my co-worker's dream life if she won the lotto. Somewhere along the way, we got on the topic of my dream to live in Westchester County, specifically in Purchase/Harrison, Scarsdale or any of the other REALLY nice towns up there. A co-worker who's from Jersey was trying to convince me that I could live in Jersey with cheaper taxes and be happy. "NO," was my basic response. I could live NYC (albeit not happily) for a job but in my mind all roads lead back here. And so the convo continues between co-worker 1 (the dream lottery winner), co-worker 2 (the NJian), and myself:

Co-worker 2: "What if you meet a guy in BROOKLYN and that's where you thought he was from, ya'll got along, and then you found out he lived in NJ?"

Me: Ummmm, I don't know."

Co-worker 2: But what if he has the house, the this, the that, and wants you to move there?"

Me: What if I have my house in Westchester County? Why can't he move there?

Co-worker 1: No but seriously? What if he wants to stay in NJ or is even from NY and wants to live there?

Me: *sigh* I don't know. I REALLY want to live in NY forever. I REALLY do. Hell, if I can't live in Westchester County, I want to live in Brooklyn Heights. (sidenote: Yes, I know I have VERY expensive living tastes. I KNOW.)

Co-Worker 1: Is it a dealbreaker for you? Can you not marry someone who wouldn't want to live in NYC?

Co-worker 2: it?

Me: *begrudgingly* NO, it isn't a dealbreaker but there needs to be a serious talk about this because this is a serious topic for me.

Co-worker 1: Would you live separately? Like him in NJ and you in NY?

Me: NO! *insert one of lil jokes here*

Co-worker 2: Ahhhh, moving for love...

So I'm thinking about, which I've done before, the idea of moving for love. In my mind, I believe that I could do it if (1) I could find a job comparable to what I have or if it is less, it would be the start of my dream job; (2) I could find my own place and (3) we were REALLY serious, which is one of the most important things. Key word: COULD. But really, WOULD I want to do that? I think I really don't have an answer because my pros and cons list would probably be about even and I don't know what the tipping point would be to make me say yay or nay.

So...what say you?


TRH said...

I had the same conversation with friends a couple of years ago and I always said I would NOT move for a man.. but now that I'm older and it there's a great oppurtunity I would leave. I'm actually contemplating it now to move to CT *clutch pearls* but the relationship is still young but job offers are coming from UP THERE.. Grr If the relationship doesn't work at least I will have a great job out of the situation and hopefully don't walk away with a bruised heart.

Kenda said...

Honestly, I think I would...IF I could find a job I loved in that area. I am a Southern girl. No matter where I go, I always end uop back in the south. If I was in love, I would go. What better reason is there to take a leap of faith?? I've never done it, but I'm open to experiencing something new. Life is short so I'm all about being happy for as long as possible. Maybe it's time for me to throw some of my "rules" out the window and just leap.

Tiffany said...

Happy Holidays.