So, I'm on Ghostface Killah's "Ghostdini the Wizard of Poetry in Emerald City" album - its been in consistent rotation for weeks now. Most know Ghost as one of the shoot em up bang bang members of Wu-Tang who, every now and then, can drop one of those very Carl Thomas-y (read: emotional) songs that the ladies will love and the guys will respect. His current album goes through a range of emotions from how he feels losing the woman he loves, believing he's found love at first sight, his rage at a cheating woman, and the list goes on and on. Anyway, listening to the album makes me think: Is he representing all men?
"...Any other day, I would of just let you, pass me by
Cuz I see you got situations
And I've got mine, but baby its OK
It's alright, I'm not gonna let you pass me by
Cuz this was love at first sight
Cuz this was love at first sight
It's OK... - "Paragraphes of Love" (chorus) Ghostface feat. Vaughn Anthony and Estelle
Now I certainly am not naive enough to believe that men do not have emotions and feelings and thoughts that can be just as deep as the women's thoughts and feelings. But of course, we don't often hear about it because "society" has made us believe that men shouldn't be able to express themselves and that results in them generally closing themselves up and leaving us to try and figure out what's going on in their heads. Lack of communication has often been a huge part of the reason couples cannot work our their differences and ultimately break up. Often times, the men are "blank stared" or even worse, laughed at when they do express themselves (even if it takes them an hour to get the words out). It's kind of like a Catch 22.
Case in point.
I was on the phone with, who was then and I'm not sure about now, a friend that I haven't seen in about a month. As we played catch up, he comes out and says "I miss you. I want to be around you because you're just so cool and sweet. I'm so glad we re-connected." He went on and on but I'll spare you all from that. Anyway, I kind of just looked at the phone and while I didn't laugh at him, I was saying to myself, "Oh yeah? Is this dude serious right now?" I'm not completely sure if I blank stared the phone because I can't imagine a guy saying stuff like this (he's over 30 so he should be at least a little comfortable with certain words) or if it was because it was HIM and with him, you're not sure if he's for real or trying to drop some game. I responded by telling him that I thought he was real cool and nice too and that it was fun chilling out with him. Said man and I still haven't seen each other and I haven't spoken to him on the phone since that day but that's beside the point. It kind of went along with my thoughts of: Do we really belittle a man's feelings and emotions? Do we truly believe that they could never be honest enough with themselves and us long enough to be expressive?
"...I appreciate your concern and support for me
Most important, your honesty and trust, your heart's incredible
This the truth spilling out of my guts
If I, would of took the chance to see
What was place right in front of my face
For sure, nine out of ten times
My actions wouldn't allow me to be so naive..."- "Do Over" by Ghostface and Raheem DeVaughn
Obviously, this is a man who may not have a chance in HELL of getting back with his woman. But the question is: in the general sense, do you believe a man can speak like this or do you laugh right from the jump?
*Miss BB Note: If this were a Music Snob post, I'd tell you to go pick up this new Ghostface album - men and women will enjoy it!